TW: Discussion of weight gain/loss
My entire life, I heard about the “dreaded Freshman 15”, the notorious weight first year students put on. As someone who has struggled with her weight and body image her whole life and puts weight on very easily, I was terrified.
As much as I went in to university hoping that I wouldn’t put on the sudden weight, I had sort of made peace with it in a way. Consequently, I was shocked when I actually lost weight within the first two months. I was living on the third floor of a building without elevators and no AC. I sweat so much the first month I was probably severely dehydrated but I still increased my water intake. I was either going up and down stairs or walking all over campus to avoid the heat. I was in a new city, and walking up to hours a day to explore. I was going out to parties every night but not drinking, even though I would dance for hours straight. I was suddenly on a meal plan and worried I would run out of money, so I limited my food for financial reasons. I was trying to make use of my school facilities so was regularly going to the gym, or taking advantage of the warm weather to run, or skating at the school rink. All this is to say, many factors contributed to this weight loss.
Nevertheless, I didn’t notice this loss until months later when I had gained it all back. I had no scale at the time, and sure, my clothes fit differently, but I was so distracted by school that I wasn’t noticing these small differences. It’s funny in hindsight, because that perfect storm for weight loss is all I ever dreamt about, and I didn’t even notice it happen!
Then I had a surplus of meal plan to spend, the weather got cold, and I would hide in my room with snacks studying until 3am every night. I began drinking when I went out. I wasn’t venturing outside much, and I was losing a lot of sleep. I kept up the same exercise and nutrition regime, but suddenly I was stressed out with finals and gaining back weight until I came home at Christmas the heaviest I’ve ever been. Then I was home with Holiday cooking and couldn’t just lose it again.
The cyclical routine of weight gain and loss continued, entirely dependent on the time of the semester and felt completely out of my control as hard as I tried to implement habits I had honed over the years. It was always “It’ll be easier when I’m home”. “It’ll be easier when I’m back on the meal plan”. I was never happy with my body, no matter if I was gaining or losing weight, 15 pounds was irrelevant now.
All this is to say, first year is only one factor is the cycle of weight gain and loss you experience throughout your life. Every experience is different, but the “Freshman 15” is not a definitive thing. It puts to words that your body will reflect the emotional changes the start of a new chapter brings.
I approached the “Freshman 15” completely wrong. I saw it strictly as a weight gain to be avoided with diet and exercise. But the “Freshman 15” is a facet of the stress your body undergoes in this transition period. It took me a little while to figure this out, but I should have been focusing on prioritizing movement that made me happy. Moving away to university meant the loss of a sport I grew up on, and it was hard finding ways to stay active that brought me the same peace. But sleep and lack of stress were always the biggest players in my weight, and my mental well-being should have therefore been my first priority.
Establishing healthy habits that made ME happy would have been easier to maintain when finals season came around. The key is finding a balance that you can maintain throughout the waves of course work. It doesn’t matter how healthy you can be off the bat if it doesn’t bring you joy and isn’t sustainable.
This is simply my personal reflection and experiences, and everyone will experience this entirely differently. This is not professional advice, but I implore every young student out there to find movement that brings them actual joy and relief. Do not guilt yourself if Brookside chocolates, Diet Coke, and sour cherries are the only thing that gets you through a late night study session- that is so ok! Reward your hard work and remember that this will not be what affects you in the long run. 🙂
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